#105.

i failed my driving test :( :( :( :( :(

still feeling depressed now la. you know how much i hate travelling an hour plus each time to bbdc!?!? BOO.

anyway, it was pouring like crazy during the test. i sang rain rain go away to myself a thousand times while waiting in the room but it seemed to have gotten even heavier when i went out. yah so it was terrible la. im always scared to drive on rainy days. and today was a supaaa rainy day :( :( anyway, the tester said raining you should double your following distance and why you check blindspots like that so dangerous yadaa yadaa. eeyer.

and so, i had no mood to go for mno lecture. dan macallister is too spontaneous for my lousy mood. so wanjou suggested to eat ice-cream and go to sleep. and so i did that!

actually im sad because of what mummy told me over the phone when i called her to tell her the result. you know i wanted to say fuck off into the phone. HOW INSENSITIVE CAN SHE GET! its as though i feel good failing la. and its my first time only what and it rained like mad what can i do. she only passed on her 5th attempt la. yup she said stuff like yah even the gods and goddesses in the sky dont wanna help you, letting it rain so heavily during your test cos you dont listen to your parents yadaa yadaa. damn damn damn. before i really lost control over whatever was going to come out of my mouth, i hung up on her. then i called papa, who was much much much much nicer to me. and thank you everyone who wished me luck and comforted me after that! rina (for lucky jelly!), wanjouu (for leading my mind off to think about juicy stuff :P), susan (for saying you're damn sad too cos we still have to walk and take buses everywhere cos i've failed :P), cheryl and huiwen (for all the friendster comments!) and happy friend and jacq and caiwang and liting and everybody who made me feel better.

i really hope my mummy will become nicer. and its not that i dont wanna listen to her but i really wanna join canoe polo. and i hate it when something unfortunate happens and she can link everything that i've ever done wrongly and nag on and on.

and then there's the commitment thing about canoe polo..

sometimes i wish pecklim didnt go to army and i could still talk to him about everything and anything and feel better and feel safer after listening to what he has to say..

oh well. i think i want more ben & jerry's!